Live and learn...what not to do!!

As a newly divorced mom, I tried to engage in all sorts of activities with my kids to venture out into our great community and even keep a few tickets of local events aside for date potentials: hockey, baseball, opera, etc. As fate would have it, I met someone and decided to try a nice date night out…my treat at the opera. The party plans consisted of a nice appetizer and drinks prior to opera, followed by whatever the night would bring.

Taking two cars didn’t make sense, so just pick me up at my home and we would go from there to the restaurant and opera. I didn’t have the kids that weekend, so I felt comfortable with Rick picking me up at the house. I felt like Cinderella coming down the stairs-- all dressed in beautiful evening wear, hair and make up done elegantly but not too much-- as the doorbell rang. Believe it or not, all girls love to get dressed up for a nice night out; I am no exception! When I opened the door, I was standing in front of one of the most handsome men on the planet! WOW!! He looked amazing!! I invited him in for a quick hello to grab my coat and purse. We were out the door in fifteen minutes tops, heading towards a nice cultural night out on the town.

The drive into the city was comfortable and filled with easy conversation. I was quite interested in learning more of Rick and his interests, hobbies, life, etc. and the drive was an opportunity to do just that. Rick was an engineering professional and described his work as multi-disciplinary, with many players adding to projects for success and completion. Much of it, honestly, I didn’t understand but was intrigued by a world I knew very little about. His explaining of it all was on a level I could understand somewhat, but more involved in details than I could comprehend. The nice thing about the drive was our sharing and despite the foreign language of engineering I was learning, he didn’t talk louder and slower! Conversely, it had been years since I had seen an Italian opera and I was looking forward to testing my language skills after many years of my proficiency in that foreign language.

We arrived at the small restaurant for appetizers and sat at a little table across from the bar. We ordered a glass of wine and appetizer to share. No, I didn’t feed him and he didn’t feed me! (Learning there are rules with that too!!) After our short time there, the opera was about to begin and we would need to make our way to our ticketed seats. Off in the car we go again to start the cultural experience. Once at the opera house, we checked our coats and mingled with a few others. By far we were some of the youngest in attendance for this evening. Hmm….okay, so I paid for season tickets and now I am going to be hanging with the geriatric crowd for the winter! What was I thinking? And a date night…uugh, he must think I am absolutely crazy!! I confess, although not catholic as mentioned MANY times before, some of my ideas are not the greatest! We took our front row, balcony seats and got cozy for the show.

As the opera began, I was catching bits and pieces of the translations realizing thankfully there is a translation slide ongoing. Rick did not speak a word of Italian and if it were not for the translations on screen, he would have been totally lost! The viewing of the opera was incredible, however, and we were close enough to enjoy the show, up close and personal! It was nothing like my college days where I was in the “rounded in Rome” theatre. I was seated next to a guy that couldn’t wait to get out of there and I was enjoying the show, but couldn’t wait to escape either! So not what a great date should be like! At intermission we both agreed on a glass of wine and questioned if maybe two would not only do the trick to get us through the night, but make it more enjoyable. I am certain Rick was getting a headache from reading the translations and I was by far trying hard to fight one off by translating in my head!

Finally the opera was over and applause was granted by the audience. The lights were dim and attendees began stirring. Rick recognized that many moving about could barely navigate the area under the lighting situation and he began ushering those to a safe route. Wow- that’s impressive! Yes, I stood awaiting our exit opportunity as he assisted in those making their way to the hall and stairway. Despite what you may think, I was thinking his parents raised a true gentleman and if I could thank them at this moment I would! He did the right thing at the right time, helping others for safety and being absolutely considerate, putting his desires aside. Lucky me to have a night out with him enduring this and yet rising to the occasion!! I’m sure if he was thinking like me…let’s blow this popsicle stand!....we would have been out of there faster than greased lightening. But, we were there patiently awaiting our turn to exit safely after our more senior friends.

After the whole opera experience, we decided to head back towards my home and our farewells. Not that exciting on an end of the date, as Rick politely escorted me to my door and declined an invitation to come in. It was an interesting night out that I decided never to repeat again. I came to the conclusion that although I tried to relieve some of the pressure of making a plan for a date, this one was a “what not to do” ever again. It might be reserved for an occasional special night few and far between with many years in between, but certainly not the thing to do while getting to know someone. So yes, I made a mistake yet again in the dating realm and admit it. Poor Rick and I never ventured again...I confess my annual tickets were not renewed either. Live and learn!